TwiMoms Need To Step Up Their Game

Have you heard about this story?

Man Bites Teen at 'New Moon' Screening

If you plan to head out for another go-round with Bella and Edward, make sure to pay attention to who's sitting around you because apparently one 17-year-old Twilight fan was actually bitten by a man sitting behind her at a recent New Moon screening in Norton Shores, Michigan.

The girl was just minding her own business, slowly drifting off into Pattinson Fantasy Land when some 45-year-old dude began making sexual comments to her and her friend. Unfortunately it didn't end there because when the film was over, the man reached over and bit the girl on the neck. Thankfully the perverted bite didn't break the skin, but the man then fled the scene and hasn't been seen since.

Dude! Duuuuude. (shakes head)
There are no words...
That poor girl probably needed the double-Silkwood shower afterwards.

And we were all feeling guilty about ogling Taylor Lautner's abs. Look, but DO NOT TOUCH!

The real question is...What was a 45 year old MAN doing at New Moon anyway?

Glee Post Of The Week

Perhaps instead of having a Crush Of The Week post, I should have a Glee Post Of The Week. Truly, its the only thing I'm crushing on lately, and I'm crushing HARD.

One word. Puck.



Can I get a what-what? What's better than Puck in a suit?

Answer: The Glee dudes as bobblehead Chippendale dancers.

Try JibJab Sendables® eCards today!

Firelight

Taylor Swift, I think you might be my new hero.

The Name "Vampire Bait" Was Taken.

As was 'Eau de Bella', 'Chagrin', 'Bite Me', and 'You Smell Good Enough To Eat. No Seriously, I Want To Stalk You and Eat You'.

Want to attract your very own Edward Cullen? Try new 'Twilight Woods' by Bath & Body Works. Smells warm and cozy, just like Bella. Just in time for the release of New Moon!

Coming soon for men, 'Sparkling Marble', a cool new scent for the holidays.

Crush Of The Week

My Glee love knows no bounds. I know this because I find myself crushing on the jerk-jock character named Noah (Puck) Puckerman played by Mark Salling. Also known as "Quinn's baby-daddy". All because on last week's episode, he showed a softer, more sensitive side to his character. It was only for a couple of seconds while he sang "Sweet Caroline" with an acoustic guitar, so if you blinked, you missed it, but let me tell you...it was ADORABLE. He even smiled. I didn't know he had teeth.

This is Mark Salling as himself, not in character.

These shots make me love him a little bit more, because hello?...nerd glasses?! I love nerds! Especially when they're not nerds at all, but super sexy hot dudes with huge biceps, masquerading as nerds! Tres emo.


And here we have the same exact NKOTB t-shirt that I myself owned about 20 years ago. A man after my own heart. See what I mean about that smile? Aw!

True Love Is...

holding a puke bucket for your spouse while the other end sprays the toilet.

...and then cleaning up the aftermath.

Today is day 6 of the stomach bug in our household. Both kids seem to have recovered just in time for my husband to get sick with it. I am the last healthy one. I hope I can escape with my guts in tact.

I Give Up On You, Community

I wanted to like you. I really did. I had such high hopes. I watched the first show with such anticipation. And wow, did that first show suck! But, I understood that pilot episodes are never that good since they really have to focus so much on explaining the plot and backstory, and just can't devote that much time to the funny. So I kept recording you and watched you every week. I wanted to love Joel McHale and laugh out loud at his snarkiness.

But you know what happened? I didn't laugh. Not at all. In fact, I kept wishing you were over so that I could just erase you from my DVR and be done with you.

So guess what, Community...I give up on you. You suck.